All You Need is Love (with a dash of trust)

I'm fairly certain that I've mentioned this book before, but I think it bears repeating. Hold on to Your Kids by Gordon Neufeld is probably one of the best "parenting" books I've read. Occasionally you meet with a book that dovetails so perfectly with your experience, it's as though it had been written for you. For so long, I've been ignoring some (thankfully not all) of my intuitions regarding DD; instead trying to adopt a more hardline approach that would, ideally, mold her into a strong and independent adult. Poor kid. It's a testament to her innate strength and independence that she has thrived in spite of our wobbly parenting skills. But I digress. This book encouraged me to trust my intuition and to keep DD's spirit in the forefront of my mind. It made me think about what I was doing and saying before I did it or said it. Am I nurturing our connection (Neufeld refers to it as attachment)? Does she know that I believe she is the greatest thing since sliced bread? If she doesn't jknow it today, she will tomorrow and all the rest of her days.

It was so easy to reject the "don't hold her too much, you'll spoil her" school of thought when she was a baby. I thought that was complete rubbish, for a baby. Looking back, I can see where I adopted that attitude somewhat once she began exhibiting her own personality. It's funny how we admire individuality as long as it's very like our own.

I'm so glad I stumbled across this book before we begin "officially" homeschooling. I'm working on deprogramming myself. I didn't realize how rigid I had become (perhaps I've always been rigid and I'm just now discovering it. What a disturbing thought. Ah well.) What I want to cultivate is a relaxed atmosphere where we all learn and grow together; sometimes pursuing individual interests, sometimes working together as a family, but always learning and growing. And laughing. Lots and lots of laughing.